I spent a long time writing a blog. About an hour and a half. Many tears went into it. But I decided to save it as a draft instead. I couldnt bear the possible respone to it. I absolutely hate hurting you and if I have to keep all my feelings to myself to keep from hurting you, then thats what I have to do.

Well yesterday was Friday. You'd think by now I would be used to the fact that I won't  get to talk to Whitney on Friday nights, but I'm lame so I'm not. It still sucks just as much as ever. I'm probably just being a big lonely baby, but I cant help it. So...last night. I came home and played CoD. But it was kinda boring so then we made dinner. Then I literally did nothing at all but lay around until 10 when I decided to just go to bed cuz there was no point in staying up really.

Today I have to do laundry. I wish we had a washer and dryer in my apartment. That way I could do other stuff as my clothes are going instead of just sitting around waiting for them to finish.

Dinner with the soon-to-be inlaws tonight. Could be fun.

I miss Whitney.

Well Mr Blog, I dont think anyone reads you anymore. But its ok, I'll be your true friend. Through to the end and all that jazz. :o guess what sir!? Today was like the best day since Whitney left. Know why?....I got to see her face! She was right there! On my computer screen! :) It was the best thing ever, for real. Made my heart happy probably for the next week :) I dont really know what else to say cuz thats all I can think about. So...good night!

Well today was a pretty productive day. First, I got off work a whole half hour earlier than usual. Mainly cuz we had nothing to do. When I got home, I got a bunch of emailing done as well as getting some sermon stuff around. Pastor Wes wants me to go to this preaching class on Sunday afternoons in February. I wasn't really excited about it but he absolutely insisted. He even offered to pay my gas money there. So I'm going. Apparently the teacher is this awesome preacher guy that I would "benefit from spending time with". We'll see I guess.
On another note, I'm eating dinner at Whitney's house on Saturday. Except Whitney isnt there. So it could be weird. But I think it should be ok. We'll see how things go I suppose. I dont mind it at all when she is there. Then again, I wouldnt mind ANY place if Whitney were with me. Well, I'm gunna go work on that puzzle over there. It's staring me down.

Well, today started out as just another day of cleaning at the mill. Second day in a row. Kinda sucks but whatever, it pays the bills. Then I came home and had some dinner and took back the movies we rented. They were pretty good I'd say. So then I played a little COD with the rooommate until Whitney got off work. She had hung out with her friends for 5 nights in a row so I was SO happy to finally be calling her before bed again. I cant explain why, but I sleep so much better on nights I  get to hear her voice. Its cheesy, I know, but its true beyond belief. Anyways, we got to talk for just over an hour before she needed to go to bed. I cant tell you how much that hour meant to me. They say one positive can outweigh all the negatives....I think I agree. I had been feeling pretty neglected as of late, but she made the time for me and it helped to heal me some. PRetty good night over all

Well my dear blog has once again been neglected for a long time! Now that I have internet, I feel like should start up again..ok thats a lie. Whitney told me I should keep a journal and so I figure this works for that. And it will give me something to do when I get jealous that she gets to go have fun with friends and I dont. Oh well. Such is life. Anyways, its about time I started writing again. Keeps the brain fresh! Perhaps it is time I write some poetry again. Who knows. I'm sure I'll find something to do with this site. Time to revamp it!

On a different note, I wish I had more pictures of Whitney and I. We need to have pics done more often to keep up-to-date. I miss her a lot ya know. Its tough to explain how I feel to her cuz she has never had to live on her own in a place without many people before. She lives in an envirnment where friendships are literally next dorm down. It isnt like that when ur not in college. But it doesnt matter. Cuz I have to suck it up cuz I want her to be happy and thats what it will take. I would willingly give myself for her. She is an amazing woman and I love her.