Recently there has been a lot of stuff going on in Masters that, as a leader, is beyond my control. I've  blogged numerous times about the difficulty in just standing with your arms open, hoping they will come. It is frustrating when they dont and yet you still have to do it as a leader. I wish I could fix all the problems, but as a leader, I can't please everyone. It's very tough when the group you are leading has turned their backs on you with no hope of reconciliation. This is definitely how I made Micaela feel last year and I am deeply grieved by that fact, but I have apologized and repaired the relationship. I realized how dumb I was my first yr to think there were too many rules. I wish I had the backbone to force people to do things. Honestly, that is what shaped me the most. I didnt like it, but it kept me to a certain standard. I saw the challenge and rose above it. Not to be gloating, but I think that me being awesome has had the opposite affect on the first yrs. Instead of trying to beat me, they just let me do it myself. Its a very immature response. Everything we do as leaders is to motivate them to be better. To be excellent! As Christians, we must hold a different standard of ourselves than the world.

          Today was a pretty lengthy one but still quite fun. We had prayer this morning, which us boys missed. We helped Derwin move an electric piano and replace it with an electric organ with the hundred pedals and all that stuff.  Pretty much like the one at HUMC actually. Then we prayed with the group and went to City Conquest. I LOVE schools. The kids just flock to me now that they know me :) its so awesome! I have such a great chance to minister now :) Then we had baked potato bar for lunch, which filled my stomach very well. Then we presented our God's Generals reports. I had Billy Sunday and my presentation was fantastic. Then it was drama practice until like 5:30. Then I went home and ate and now I'm WEBCAMMING WITH WHIT! :D YAAAAY! I love it so much! My heart feels wonderful right now! :)

          Prayer time today was the best thing ever! No joke! Grant used playlist.com to do his prayer music and boy did it ever deliver! First, the Lifehouse song came on and right as it was about to build up, it just switched songs. This was funny cuz Grant was singing when it switched :) Then another song had a guy talking on the end of it about the next song they were gunna play...only that song didnt come on lol And to top it all off, Skillet's "Whispers In The Dark" came on later :) hilarious! John actually started headbanging. Best prayer time ever? I think so.

          This week has been quite an uneventful one. On Monday I played video games ALL day. Literally. I played God of War II for over 6 hours...in a row. Great game but still prolly not a good idea to play for so long.  Yesterday though had a little more in store. We had City Conquest, which is always fun. I played lots of basketball and talked to some kids about comin to Uth on Wednesday night. Then we had drama practice and the boys got some study time cuz the girls were practicing Revelation Song. I also got my full set of church keys today so now I can get anywhere without having to ask. Which is nice I guess but it also means I'm also on lock up duty.
          I'm feeling very summery today :) I love the new weather!

         I feel a deep sorrow in my heart. I never thought I could feel this way. Most of you reading this won't know what I'm talking about. All of you but one. I miss her. I miss her throughout every seam of my body and soul. My heart is physically hurting with the sorrow it contains. My heart longs for her with a pain so literal I almost cannot bear it. I miss her. I need her. How I long for her beautiful face to grace my day! Just one look, one smile, one kiss...just one would prepare my heart for the journey. Only one. The agony of the distance brings me to tears. I need her desperately. Desperate enough to let myself cry. Desperate enough to walk for days to see her. Desperate enough to give it all up to hold her. I love her with all that I have. And I always will. Forever.

          So we are finally back in Hamilton...and I'm not a fan.  First though, let me get you caught up on whats been going on. Yesterday we did service in Howe. It was a lot of fun. I preached, which was fun. Looking back at it though, I kind of wish John had preached. I think it would have been more impactful for them. I am fresh and still stumble on my word and speak too fast out of excitement and nerves. I am progressing though and thats what counts right now right? I'm testing my abilities so I can grow and know what needs changed and fixed about my preaching. Anyways, I enjoyed it even if I thought I coulda done better. Then we went to Life Care and headed back here.
          I should be happy to be back in Hamilton....but I'm not. Don't get me wrong, I love it here and I love MCGC but I miss Whitney soo terribly much. My heart has literally ached since I left LaGrange. A physical hurt. I went three months without her and then got three DAYS with her before going another two months without her again. I usually stay strong, but its always a mask. Its soooo difficult to stay happy when your best friend is hrs and hrs away. Especially when times get tough here. I am soooo thankful that her mom bought us webcams. I hope they make things easier for us. I would love to see her more often. I love her so much and I honestly believe we will be together for as long as we live.

          This week has been an amazing week for MCGC, but some time off today is definitely in need. I love having time to just sit around and do nothing at all! Its wonderful! And I will get to spend this whole day with Whitney! Woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooot!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Anyways, last night we went to Winter Jam. What a great time! Tenth Ave North, Fireflight, Third Day....it was awesome. I had to restrain myself from buying up a bunch of stuff :) it was hard but I did it lol So that is all for now. I will post again tomorrow most likely in the words of wisdom section.

         So today was a long day that went very very well. We met with Pastor Jack Smith of EFI and had an AMAZING class on eschatology! LOVED IT! Then we did service at EFI. Once again, an amazing time was had by all. This week has truly been a blessing to me and I hope the rest of it will get us rested up for Sunday so that we can bring our best to Howe :) It's time to show em what we got :)

          So today was like day....4 in our Indiana tour. It is honestly getting hard to keep track of my days now lol sadly enough. Anyways, let me catch you up.
          On Saturday, we were in Indianapolis for a youth rally with an Alice in Wonderland theme. Very cool actually, not weird at all. We did a drama and helped be fun and entertaining during giveaways and things and that was about it. We left and arrived at our Hartford City motel around 11:30. Then on Sunday morning, we went to Olive Branch Church of the Nazarene (also known as Dewey's dad's church). We had breakfast and then did our Masters thing for service. We did Making Gravy and Times, both of which went very very well. Then it was lunch and we left for Goshen. We came to Goshen and did a drama training with some of their youth kids and adults as well. It was definitely fun. Then yesterday we went to SPA, a women's recovery home. We shared testimonies and really just had good fellowship. After lunch, we headed to the South Bend Juvenile Detention Center and had a service with them. It went very very well and I think lives really were impacted there.
          Today though we got to sleep in late and have a brunch. Then we went to SOS, which is the men's version of SPA. We sat in on an AMAZING class they were having. I felt so rejuvenated by this class. It was speaking about how we tend to try to "sell" Christianity instead of looking at it like a marriage and dating kind of union. AMAZING class! Then we headed back here to Quinn's parent's house to just chill for the night. Indiana has been great so far and I look forward to the rest of the week. We need the relaxation days :)

          So today is Tuesday, which means I had City Conquest today. It was pretty awesome, I must say. Seems the big problem in schools today is just drama, which has always been that way cuz that's how it was when I was in school as well. I also invited 5-6 people to church this Wednesday night so hopefully they'll show up! Then we had drama practice, which went ok I guess. Nothing too amazing except for the very last take of Don''t Touch. John really kinda laid down the law today, if you know what I mean. He challenged everyone to step up. I hope it will pay off for everyone and that we can really step up our ministry. Then we got new reports to work on. These reports are on "God's Generals". My report is on Billy Sunday. I am very excited about these reports. I loooove learning more about the power preachers from back in the day. I'm stoked! That's all for now. I'll prolly have some more words of wisdom coming soon. I posted there this morning, check it out! See ya!